Need opinions for this Fan Fiction


The_Technophile

 

Posted

Hey, guys. I created a short story in a short time and need opinions for self-record signing. Thanks in advance.


The Impeccable of the Independence
By: The Technophile

"Hello, my name is Rocky Wrecker, I have super strength and can cover myself in anything that is earth. This is my story of how I became the only one left standing in my Super Group.

We will start with the villain of the story, it's name is unknown but by default I called him Noisy. He has a wolf's head, a wolf's tail, a human body with black fur and skin, has blue ghosts twirling around him and genuine skulls on his chest, shoulders and knees.

Why Noisy? Because his abilities are based on his singing. He summons ghosts, raises dead and controls negative manner. No one can remember it's singing because those who live become def… Like me.

I have researched it since after our battle with it and found that he was in blurry pictures in 4 underdeveloped countries that a 1/10 of each country's population was mysteriously killed. If Noisy was the culprit then Paragon City is in trouble.

Me and my girlfriend Flaming Betty have a P.H.D in Philosophy and we shared our project in gaining it in proving that the mythical creatures known as the Cyclops and the Minotaur existed, so we know how to find a creature. But instead, the creature found us. 34 of my Supergroup members have died just by hearing the creature sing then me and the rest have put ear plugs, but it wasn't enough. Noisy summoned endless number of Zombies and ghosts every time we kill them, eventually the entire Supergroup, and my dreamgirl, died.

I was but barely breathing when Noisy came to me, removed my earplugs and started to sing. The pain was more of a torment than torture, mixing my memories so I can't resist and pressuring my mind in an extreme level and as soon as I became def, my ears bled and the creature walked away with me barely alive.

This creature's nature is very bizarre, it kills those who it thinks would be a great pleasure in "teaching a lesson" but only those who bleed through the ears as it plays it's song earn their reward in living and never to be killed by it in future presences.

Paragon City calls it the Gore Melody, and as I was telling the story, I have realized that because of me, Noisy is killing a lot less because the ultimate finale of my bloody ears has satisfied it. It took my perfect ears to save all 48 of my Supergroup members and my girlfriend. This is my ultimate penalty of being naive, I needed to be independent."

No cruel comments like "It's horrible, you suck!"
Mature comments only, please.


Main characters:
Shalite - Ninjas/Poison Villain Mastermind. Solo challenger in PvE.
The Gore Melody - Necro/Dark Vigilante Mastermind. Solo challenger in PvE.
Technophile Lila - SJ/Fire Hero Brute. Outstanding Farmer.