Instead of reposting a long story I'll just post a link to a Creative topic. It's about three youngsters finding their powers. Lots of family fun.
* A for Android: Summertime Sonata
((lets have a go then kinda hard for me since GS found his powers and was told what to do with them but lets try, this is him discovering and using his powers for the first time))
Jack Whitechaple, commander of the 45th english patrol unit on the beaches of normandy sludged his way through the ever increasing quagmire of mud, dead bodies and excrement. The fighting had lasted much of the day, the Nazi's had been holding off the advances of the allies but eventually they had broken through and were advancing from the beaches.
Jack looked up, it was raining, typical, it always seemed to be raining here, the rain soaked through your boots and into your feet growing interesting plant life if you left it too long. He looked back at his unit, they were at half numbers since the last attack and were tired and afraid, a lot of them knew that they had to do what they had to do and so trudge through the mud after their commander.
They were approaching a small hill and had had reports of a military outpost on top, with three west facing machineguns, approximately 10 people manning them and as many grenades. The 45th assembled in some trees at the bottom of the hill, if they were lucky the nazis hadn't noticed them yet and they could get a clean break to some cover half way up the hill before the machine guns opened fire. The soldiers discarded their heavy baggage and ran softly up the hill, made hard by the mud that went up past their ankles getting deeper with each step. After a few seconds of running they heard voices from the hill, they increased their pace but when they were about a quarter of the way up, they opened fire, mowing down Jack's regiment, men dying everywhere, their bodies sinking into the mud some drowning before dying from their bullet wounds.
By the time they reached the cover half way up the hill Jack was exhausted and his unit severely diminished, he also knew that since they had stopped by now almost every machine gun up there would be pointing at the ruins which they hid behind. Jack reached behind his back and pulled out a grenade, he pulled the pin and through it at the gun emplacement, barely getting back behind the walls before the machinegun started up again. There was a few seconds silences and the an explosion along with cries of chargrin as Jack and the regiment cheered seeing some sandbags and one of the machine guns roll down the hill.
Jack signalled to the troop to stop their cheering and he waited for what he deemed to be an appropriate time to charge. As he did so something flew past his shoulder and landed with a squelch in the mud, he turned to pick up the grenade and through it back but by now it had already begun to sink into the mud beneath him, many others were also frantically looking around for grenades whilst the germans laughed on top of the gun emplacement. Jack began to run but all the grenades exploded at once, throwing up mud and dirt along with the rest of the ruins into the sky, when the muck cleared Jack was half buried and surrounded by screaming or crying men, some missing arms or legs, some dead altogether, some like Jack had escaped the carnage but most were half buried underneath the mud, sure that if they moved the machineguns would shoot through the now crippled cover and annihilate the rest of the team.
As Jack lay there, his mind racing through possible circumstances or manoeuvers he could try he looked back at one of the grenades craters, although the mud was slowly slopping back into it Jack could definitly see some stairs and before the mud could cover the whole or the nazis open fire he leapt into the crater landing on some ancient steps. Some others followed him, he instructed them to stand guard and walked farther down into the... whatever it was. The tunnel was long and strait going at about a 45 degree angle downwards, the walls were stone and covered in runes that glowed slightly casting eery shadows across the floor. In niches on the side there were statues of creatures and men, of statesman, ancient greeks, even hitler and some of the Nazi heroes, looking off at other tunnels Jack assumed that every hero must have some form of statue here.
As he walked further down he came to a doorway above which were carved the words 'Gauisus Somnium' and on one side of the door was a statue of an unrecognisable hero, possibly a minor hero from paragon, and on the other side was a statue of himself, as Jack gazed at it he saw its lips move and a voice echoe through the cave, 'enter'. Jack did.
Inside the room everything was lit in a half light from torches along the edge of the walls, the floor was covered in bones, the walls lined in skulls, but not the arrangement of say a mad man or avid collector, it appeared mournful, and as Jack checked the area he heard a sound coming softly over the boneyard, increasing in volume and filling his down trodden heart with a warm sense of being, as if finally he had done something universally right.
As he walked further into the room he saw, sitting ontop of a mountain of bones a young girl, floating slightly off the floor and playing a small set of panpipes, she looked to be around six but she had large wings that stretched across the entire room making, as Jack had previously thought, the back wall, but upon peering under it he realised that the room probably went on for miles. The wings were black and the small girl held the apparently effortlessly as she played her song. She wore a small dress, made of flowers and one rose was in her hair, it had black petals and it almost seemed to grow from her glossy black hair.
Jack sat and listened, mesmerised by the playing until the girl finished, the panpipes dissappeared and she stepped forward towards Jack, the further she moved towards him the older she became until she was about the same age as Jack when she stood before him. When she reached him she touched him lightly on the forehead and mutter a couple of words. Within him Jack could feel his pulse quicken, his lungs move slower and all his hunger and pain and sadness evaporate into the dry air of the tomb. He closed his eyes and felt the changes within him, he went inside his body and saw his blood changing, no longer was it a red liquid but now a black gas like shadows that flowed through his veins, his heart beated slower and so did his lungs and his mind was more much more relaxed and intellegent. As he returned to his normal state of mind he opened his eyes and saw the girl as she was when he had first saw her, sitting on the bones. He really wanted to be able to see himself, he knew that if so much had happened inside him then surely the outside must be different and as easy as that he was looking at himself from a third person view.
He was taller, more muscular, and as far as Jack could see, still changing. His nose elongated along with his chin and became a snout, hair grew all over his body, he could even hear the bones in his legs snap as the contorted into strange shapes before settling down and staying at a final horrible angle. He had became something of a dog creature, his fur was a glossy black like the hair of the girl, his arms were longer and he was lent slightly forward as if he was a dog that had just got off its two feet. Then the same voice said to him.
'go, do what you must do and make me proud Gauisus Somnium,' the girl smiled as Jacks mind returned to his body and when he continued to stand motionless she smiled, 'go on,' before turning and muttering to herself, 'stupid puppy'.
Before jack knew it he had burst out of the mud that now covered the entrance and past the 3 guards he had set there who screamed in terror as black wolf flowed past them, now on all fours and aside from being bigger, more muscular and faster most definitly a wolf.
***
The gunners laughed, chatting in German and imitating the screams of those they had killed below, jumping around the place or swearing over the loss of their machine gun which they had featched back and were now trying to fix. One gunner named Rudolf Hess laughed, he was proud of his name, it was that of his hero and as he laughed with his friends he looked down the hills at the ruins and saw, running from them, a black wolf. He jumped and called to his friends who manned the machine guns by instinct, they laughed when they saw the wolf and one of them opened fire they laughed and opened fire, the wolf kept on running and the bullets past right through it, even when the other gun began firing the wolf kept coming, running across the ground on top of the mud, its paws hardly touching the surface.
When it reached the barricade it leaped and landed on Rudolf ripping out hsi throat and spinning in on fluid motion, in much the same way he ran between the other 8 men, ripping out hamstrings and throats until only one remained cowering in a corner sitting in a puddle of his own [censored]. As the wolf walked towards him he changed, slowly becoming an allied trooper, he looked much like the commander of the troop they had just fired upon but he couldn't be, he was taller, had nocolour to his eyes and was surrounded by a mist of shadow which flickered as faces formed in it laughing at the young man who cowered in the corner. He racked his mind thinking of all the allied heroes he knew, for he had never heard of this guy, he put his hands up in a sign of truce hoping that this guy was also like other allied heroes who were famed for taking prisoners, unfortunately this was not the case.
The man lowered his gun but reached out his hand which was now clad in shadow which had rolled down his arm and engulfed it as it moved slowly towards the terrified soldier. He screamed once as Jack plunged his hand into the mans chest, breaking through the rib bones and grabbing the heart, he could feel it beating and ripped it from the mans chest, the mans face seemed surprised and his mouth was open, Jack shoved the heart down his throat and then plunged one finger through his forehead and into his brain, the result was gruesome and Jack used the blood to wright a message on the walls in German, it said quite clearly 'leave me along', apparently pleaed with his work Jack changed back to a wolf and bounded down the hill, through the tunnels and back to the cavern.
***
Still sitting there was the young girl, Jack now knew her name, she was Soloquial, a minor and unknown goddess previously worshipped by the aztecs. The girl smiled when she saw Jack and spoke to him, her mouth moved but it was nothing like the words that she spoke, it was like bad dubbing on a Japanese film.
She spoke in his mind saying. 'so, have you made your choice? is this the way you will be? the aztecs followed the path you are on, giving in to desire and the will to destroy, they became fanatics and i left them, i would not accept their human sacrifices. Or will you take a better path, will you control yourself, will you control your anger and your desires and use your new powers to better mankind? Not many people are given the same choice as you, many know the answer straight away and yet you... you think about it... as if you don't know in your heart which you are this either means you are very stupid or intellegent enough to realise that no man truly knows what he is inside.' Jack grinned and said, 'i serve you, as i have done since the beginning of time oh my whimsical little divinity. Soloquial smiled, 'i'll like this one,' and then spoke louder, 'so your already accepting your role, most people take years to discover their past locked within their minds and yet here you are and in one brief moment of slaughter you know why you are here and who you were?' The girl grinned as the Soldier nodded, 'and you have made your choice,' the soldier nodded again, the girl laughed and ran down the bones jumping and dissapearing into Shadows reappearing on Jacks shoulder smiling happily. Jack strode out of the temple signalling to his soldiers who followed wordlessly, he strode to the dead scattered around and healed those who could be, burying those who were too far gone or putting them out of their misery.
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((lets have a go then kinda hard for me since GS found his powers and was told what to do with them but lets try, this is him discovering and using his powers for the first time))
Jack Whitechaple, commander of the 45th english patrol unit on the beaches of normandy sludged his way through the ever increasing quagmire of mud, dead bodies and excrement. The fighting had lasted much of the day, the Nazi's had been holding off the advances of the allies but eventually they had broken through and were advancing from the beaches.
Jack looked up, it was raining, typical, it always seemed to be raining here, the rain soaked through your boots and into your feet growing interesting plant life if you left it too long. He looked back at his unit, they were at half numbers since the last attack and were tired and afraid, a lot of them knew that they had to do what they had to do and so trudge through the mud after their commander.
They were approaching a small hill and had had reports of a military outpost on top, with three west facing machineguns, approximately 10 people manning them and as many grenades. The 45th assembled in some trees at the bottom of the hill, if they were lucky the nazis hadn't noticed them yet and they could get a clean break to some cover half way up the hill before the machine guns opened fire. The soldiers discarded their heavy baggage and ran softly up the hill, made hard by the mud that went up past their ankles getting deeper with each step. After a few seconds of running they heard voices from the hill, they increased their pace but when they were about a quarter of the way up, they opened fire, mowing down Jack's regiment, men dying everywhere, their bodies sinking into the mud some drowning before dying from their bullet wounds.
By the time they reached the cover half way up the hill Jack was exhausted and his unit severely diminished, he also knew that since they had stopped by now almost every machine gun up there would be pointing at the ruins which they hid behind. Jack reached behind his back and pulled out a grenade, he pulled the pin and through it at the gun emplacement, barely getting back behind the walls before the machinegun started up again. There was a few seconds silences and the an explosion along with cries of chargrin as Jack and the regiment cheered seeing some sandbags and one of the machine guns roll down the hill.
Jack signalled to the troop to stop their cheering and he waited for what he deemed to be an appropriate time to charge. As he did so something flew past his shoulder and landed with a squelch in the mud, he turned to pick up the grenade and through it back but by now it had already begun to sink into the mud beneath him, many others were also frantically looking around for grenades whilst the germans laughed on top of the gun emplacement. Jack began to run but all the grenades exploded at once, throwing up mud and dirt along with the rest of the ruins into the sky, when the muck cleared Jack was half buried and surrounded by screaming or crying men, some missing arms or legs, some dead altogether, some like Jack had escaped the carnage but most were half buried underneath the mud, sure that if they moved the machineguns would shoot through the now crippled cover and annihilate the rest of the team.
As Jack lay there, his mind racing through possible circumstances or manoeuvers he could try he looked back at one of the grenades craters, although the mud was slowly slopping back into it Jack could definitly see some stairs and before the mud could cover the whole or the nazis open fire he leapt into the crater landing on some ancient steps. Some others followed him, he instructed them to stand guard and walked farther down into the... whatever it was. The tunnel was long and strait going at about a 45 degree angle downwards, the walls were stone and covered in runes that glowed slightly casting eery shadows across the floor. In niches on the side there were statues of creatures and men, of statesman, ancient greeks, even hitler and some of the Nazi heroes, looking off at other tunnels Jack assumed that every hero must have some form of statue here.
As he walked further down he came to a doorway above which were carved the words 'Gauisus Somnium' and on one side of the door was a statue of an unrecognisable hero, possibly a minor hero from paragon, and on the other side was a statue of himself, as Jack gazed at it he saw its lips move and a voice echoe through the cave, 'enter'. Jack did.
Inside the room everything was lit in a half light from torches along the edge of the walls, the floor was covered in bones, the walls lined in skulls, but not the arrangement of say a mad man or avid collector, it appeared mournful, and as Jack checked the area he heard a sound coming softly over the boneyard, increasing in volume and filling his down trodden heart with a warm sense of being, as if finally he had done something universally right.
As he walked further into the room he saw, sitting ontop of a mountain of bones a young girl, floating slightly off the floor and playing a small set of panpipes, she looked to be around six but she had large wings that stretched across the entire room making, as Jack had previously thought, the back wall, but upon peering under it he realised that the room probably went on for miles. The wings were black and the small girl held the apparently effortlessly as she played her song. She wore a small dress, made of flowers and one rose was in her hair, it had black petals and it almost seemed to grow from her glossy black hair.
Jack sat and listened, mesmerised by the playing until the girl finished, the panpipes dissappeared and she stepped forward towards Jack, the further she moved towards him the older she became until she was about the same age as Jack when she stood before him. When she reached him she touched him lightly on the forehead and mutter a couple of words. Within him Jack could feel his pulse quicken, his lungs move slower and all his hunger and pain and sadness evaporate into the dry air of the tomb. He closed his eyes and felt the changes within him, he went inside his body and saw his blood changing, no longer was it a red liquid but now a black gas like shadows that flowed through his veins, his heart beated slower and so did his lungs and his mind was more much more relaxed and intellegent. As he returned to his normal state of mind he opened his eyes and saw the girl as she was when he had first saw her, sitting on the bones. He really wanted to be able to see himself, he knew that if so much had happened inside him then surely the outside must be different and as easy as that he was looking at himself from a third person view.
He was taller, more muscular, and as far as Jack could see, still changing. His nose elongated along with his chin and became a snout, hair grew all over his body, he could even hear the bones in his legs snap as the contorted into strange shapes before settling down and staying at a final horrible angle. He had became something of a dog creature, his fur was a glossy black like the hair of the girl, his arms were longer and he was lent slightly forward as if he was a dog that had just got off its two feet. Then the same voice said to him.
'go, do what you must do and make me proud Gauisus Somnium,' the girl smiled as Jacks mind returned to his body and when he continued to stand motionless she smiled, 'go on,' before turning and muttering to herself, 'stupid puppy'.
Before jack knew it he had burst out of the mud that now covered the entrance and past the 3 guards he had set there who screamed in terror as black wolf flowed past them, now on all fours and aside from being bigger, more muscular and faster most definitly a wolf.
***
The gunners laughed, chatting in German and imitating the screams of those they had killed below, jumping around the place or swearing over the loss of their machine gun which they had featched back and were now trying to fix. One gunner named Rudolf Hess laughed, he was proud of his name, it was that of his hero and as he laughed with his friends he looked down the hills at the ruins and saw, running from them, a black wolf. He jumped and called to his friends who manned the machine guns by instinct, they laughed when they saw the wolf and one of them opened fire they laughed and opened fire, the wolf kept on running and the bullets past right through it, even when the other gun began firing the wolf kept coming, running across the ground on top of the mud, its paws hardly touching the surface.
When it reached the barricade it leaped and landed on Rudolf ripping out hsi throat and spinning in on fluid motion, in much the same way he ran between the other 8 men, ripping out hamstrings and throats until only one remained cowering in a corner sitting in a puddle of his own [censored]. As the wolf walked towards him he changed, slowly becoming an allied trooper, he looked much like the commander of the troop they had just fired upon but he couldn't be, he was taller, had nocolour to his eyes and was surrounded by a mist of shadow which flickered as faces formed in it laughing at the young man who cowered in the corner. He racked his mind thinking of all the allied heroes he knew, for he had never heard of this guy, he put his hands up in a sign of truce hoping that this guy was also like other allied heroes who were famed for taking prisoners, unfortunately this was not the case.
The man lowered his gun but reached out his hand which was now clad in shadow which had rolled down his arm and engulfed it as it moved slowly towards the terrified soldier. He screamed once as Jack plunged his hand into the mans chest, breaking through the rib bones and grabbing the heart, he could feel it beating and ripped it from the mans chest, the mans face seemed surprised and his mouth was open, Jack shoved the heart down his throat and then plunged one finger through his forehead and into his brain, the result was gruesome and Jack used the blood to wright a message on the walls in German, it said quite clearly 'leave me along', apparently pleaed with his work Jack changed back to a wolf and bounded down the hill, through the tunnels and back to the cavern.
***
Still sitting there was the young girl, Jack now knew her name, she was Soloquial, a minor and unknown goddess previously worshipped by the aztecs. The girl smiled when she saw Jack and spoke to him, her mouth moved but it was nothing like the words that she spoke, it was like bad dubbing on a Japanese film.
She spoke in his mind saying. 'so, have you made your choice? is this the way you will be? the aztecs followed the path you are on, giving in to desire and the will to destroy, they became fanatics and i left them, i would not accept their human sacrifices. Or will you take a better path, will you control yourself, will you control your anger and your desires and use your new powers to better mankind? Not many people are given the same choice as you, many know the answer straight away and yet you... you think about it... as if you don't know in your heart which you are this either means you are very stupid or intellegent enough to realise that no man truly knows what he is inside.' Jack grinned and said, 'i serve you, as i have done since the beginning of time oh my whimsical little divinity. Soloquial smiled, 'i'll like this one,' and then spoke louder, 'so your already accepting your role, most people take years to discover their past locked within their minds and yet here you are and in one brief moment of slaughter you know why you are here and who you were?' The girl grinned as the Soldier nodded, 'and you have made your choice,' the soldier nodded again, the girl laughed and ran down the bones jumping and dissapearing into Shadows reappearing on Jacks shoulder smiling happily. Jack strode out of the temple signalling to his soldiers who followed wordlessly, he strode to the dead scattered around and healed those who could be, burying those who were too far gone or putting them out of their misery.
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Very Gory! 
I like it! 
8/10
cheers 
although i would probably change wear it says 'leave me alone' to 'sweet dreams' now i think about it, it fits the character better
[ QUOTE ]
cheers although i would probably change wear it says 'leave me alone' to 'sweet dreams' now i think about it, it fits the character better
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Now you mention it, it would suit better still good thought, very long too which is always good.
think it is worth putting on the creative forum for some others to take a glance at? and i like the gore too, it is so much more realistic then, 'he killed him' i have always found that thinking how angry i would be helps, something i try to avoid is not being real, for example in some books one character survives at all odds, the books i like is where he can die, and where (in many books he does) i think it is more lifelike and makes you more familiar with the characters
<-- not that i would know lol
LoL well it is well worth putting on the creative forum
Onoes it is teh dieing bump
OOC: this Topic will be focused around every young 'Super' struggling to find there powers and seperate right from wrong it's where you can post your Charecters 'turning point' the moument when they use there powers for good or evil for the first time, eg. The thing that made them a hero or villain and made them realised what to become.
I won't be posting because my COH/COV account is offline and it won't be running for few good months
So feel free to post yours.
Oh and I will be commenting if i like them ornot