Its a thankless task, at least in Paragon City. Hell, we dont even get paid for doing it. Sure, we get influence and prestige; Hero currency they call it, but you try to buy anything thats not directly hero related and its cashy-money they want. All the spandex and flashy colours count for nothing at the supermarket checkout.
So what do you do? Take on a day job. When Im not risking my neck to bring down some cartel of super-powered villains, Im delivering pizzas just to keep a roof over my head and pay my enormous dry cleaning bill. Thats right, pizza delivery! Because of course Im not skilled in anything other than hero work Im stuck doing some minimum wage job to make ends meet. Its pretty common in the hero community. I knew a guy who made his living cleaning the windows of skyscrapers and made good money at it as well. He got paid per window and of course, being bale to fly meant he could clean a lot of windows over the course of a day.
So anyway, Ive been working in Paragon a few months now and worked my way up to Security level 36. Im doing fine, settling into the rhythm of things, working mostly out of Founder Falls, but my Super Group asks if I can swing by Atlas Park and pay the rent on the base. Stupidly, I say yes. Despite it being a trek and two trains from Founders I go anyway. Atlas was where I started out and I didnt mind seeing my old haunt again.
I pay the rent and am struck by the sudden impulse to go see the Hollows. Im betting it looks different now Ive got a travel power. I remember some of the hellish treks across the Hollows to missions and I think itll be a giggle to explore it properly now I can outrun most motor vehicles.
As Im running towards the Hollows gate I pass a woman being accosted by a couple of Hellions. I realise I should stop to help and even slow down a little, but this is Atlas Park, Im hugely over-powered for the thugs that hang about here and firmly believe one of the heroes operating in the area will swing by to help her soon enough. So I kick back into high gear and go on my merry, giving the poor woman not another thought.
At least not until the subpoena arrives.
Apparently no other hero had come along in time and the Hellions had roughed her up pretty good and as shed been lying in hospital when some ambulance chaser had gotten to her and implanted the idea of suing the city, but Ill bet he thought all his Christmases had come at once when she told him a hero at passed by and hadnt stopped to help.
The talking heads on TV have been complaining about this for months, possibly even years. Of heroes not stopping to help every victim they come across and how awful this is and how ashamed of ourselves we should be. Our heroic deeds against arch villains count for nothing because they happen in some underground fortress that no one sees or really cares about, well, not until he unleashes his death-beam and vaporises part of the city and THEN the talking heads start on about where were the heroes, why didnt they stop this blah, blah, blah, because theres really no keeping them happy, because happy talking heads have lower viewing figures.
Anyway, Im getting off the point. Slowing down as I passed gave the woman enough time to recognise me and a target for the lawsuit. Fifteen million they wanted out of me!! Can you believe it? Thats an awful lot of pizza to deliver.
The womans lawyer was obviously banking on the citys coffers backing me up but of course it doesnt work that way. The city viewed the lawsuit as a serious complaint and suspended my license pending an investigation, which is standard operating procedure. So I call up the lawyer and arrange a meeting to discuss settling out of court. On my salary I cant even afford a lawyer and wanted to avoid court altogether and thought maybe a face-to-face meeting would sort it out. Maybe if I apologised.
How stupid am I?
The womans at the meeting wearing one of those bandage collars and sporting a crutch but I think she was just hamming it up, probably under the instructions of her lawyer. Anyway, I explain right away that the city isnt going to back me up financially and that I didnt have an eight figure nest egg tucked away in my mattress, so he could forget a multi-million dollar payout. It was never going to happen. The look of disappointment on his face was almost enough to make me laugh, but I resisted. This was, after all, pretty serious.
So then he starts talking numbers, much reduced from the initial fifteen million, but still awfully big numbers from a pizza delivery boys point of view. Two-hundred thousand, payable over ten years would be an amicable settlement, he says. It was then that I did laugh in his face. That was pretty much every cent I would make over the next ten years. So I make a counter offer of free pizza every week for a year and he accuses me of not taking the matter seriously, which was true, but how could I? The whole thing was preposterous.
The woman starts crying and I apologise again and I do sympathise with her, what she went through must have been pretty bad, but I point out that it wasnt me that robbed her or beat her up and that Im not under any official obligation to save any individual person and that just makes matters worse and that maybe shes just lashing out at me because she cant lash out at the people who did this.
She starts crying harder, making me feel worse and the lawyers still banging on about numbers. Hes down to seventy-five grand over ten years, but I can tell hes just trying to make himself a little cash. To salvage something out of the ashes of what he thought was going to be his career making case. He doesnt care about his client. Im trying to comfort the woman and hes shouting at me and then Im shouting at him. Then hes poking he me in the chest and then Im pushing him and then he hits me with the womans crutch and then
Well, it was an accident. I didnt mean to do it. It just sort of happened. A nova in a confined space isnt something you want to see up close, but the lawyer and the woman got ringside seats. Fortunately they both survived, although their injuries were pretty severe, although Im told theyll both make full recoveries. The people upstairs got away with a few broken bones, sustained when the floor collapsed out from under them and the building had to be demolished as the explosion had rendered it structurally unsafe.
At that point the city did intervene. They paid off everyone injured in the blast, made them sign non-disclosure agreements on pain of heavy legal action. They told the media that it was a ruptured gas main that wrecked the building and put a gag order on any speculation that deviated from the official line and lastly they revoked my license and told me Id never be a hero in this town again.
And to be honest Im kind of glad. I could use a break from hero work. It was all becoming a big a chore and one Id never get thanked for. So now I deliver pizzas full time and youd do well to remember that, because next time to decide to stiff the delivery boy for a tip he may well take it upon himself to flatten your whole house.
HERO WORK
Its a thankless task, at least in Paragon City. Hell, we dont even get paid for doing it. Sure, we get influence and prestige; Hero currency they call it, but you try to buy anything thats not directly hero related and its cashy-money they want. All the spandex and flashy colours count for nothing at the supermarket checkout.
So what do you do? Take on a day job. When Im not risking my neck to bring down some cartel of super-powered villains, Im delivering pizzas just to keep a roof over my head and pay my enormous dry cleaning bill. Thats right, pizza delivery! Because of course Im not skilled in anything other than hero work Im stuck doing some minimum wage job to make ends meet. Its pretty common in the hero community. I knew a guy who made his living cleaning the windows of skyscrapers and made good money at it as well. He got paid per window and of course, being bale to fly meant he could clean a lot of windows over the course of a day.
So anyway, Ive been working in Paragon a few months now and worked my way up to Security level 36. Im doing fine, settling into the rhythm of things, working mostly out of Founder Falls, but my Super Group asks if I can swing by Atlas Park and pay the rent on the base. Stupidly, I say yes. Despite it being a trek and two trains from Founders I go anyway. Atlas was where I started out and I didnt mind seeing my old haunt again.
I pay the rent and am struck by the sudden impulse to go see the Hollows. Im betting it looks different now Ive got a travel power. I remember some of the hellish treks across the Hollows to missions and I think itll be a giggle to explore it properly now I can outrun most motor vehicles.
As Im running towards the Hollows gate I pass a woman being accosted by a couple of Hellions. I realise I should stop to help and even slow down a little, but this is Atlas Park, Im hugely over-powered for the thugs that hang about here and firmly believe one of the heroes operating in the area will swing by to help her soon enough. So I kick back into high gear and go on my merry, giving the poor woman not another thought.
At least not until the subpoena arrives.
Apparently no other hero had come along in time and the Hellions had roughed her up pretty good and as shed been lying in hospital when some ambulance chaser had gotten to her and implanted the idea of suing the city, but Ill bet he thought all his Christmases had come at once when she told him a hero at passed by and hadnt stopped to help.
The talking heads on TV have been complaining about this for months, possibly even years. Of heroes not stopping to help every victim they come across and how awful this is and how ashamed of ourselves we should be. Our heroic deeds against arch villains count for nothing because they happen in some underground fortress that no one sees or really cares about, well, not until he unleashes his death-beam and vaporises part of the city and THEN the talking heads start on about where were the heroes, why didnt they stop this blah, blah, blah, because theres really no keeping them happy, because happy talking heads have lower viewing figures.
Anyway, Im getting off the point. Slowing down as I passed gave the woman enough time to recognise me and a target for the lawsuit. Fifteen million they wanted out of me!! Can you believe it? Thats an awful lot of pizza to deliver.
The womans lawyer was obviously banking on the citys coffers backing me up but of course it doesnt work that way. The city viewed the lawsuit as a serious complaint and suspended my license pending an investigation, which is standard operating procedure. So I call up the lawyer and arrange a meeting to discuss settling out of court. On my salary I cant even afford a lawyer and wanted to avoid court altogether and thought maybe a face-to-face meeting would sort it out. Maybe if I apologised.
How stupid am I?
The womans at the meeting wearing one of those bandage collars and sporting a crutch but I think she was just hamming it up, probably under the instructions of her lawyer. Anyway, I explain right away that the city isnt going to back me up financially and that I didnt have an eight figure nest egg tucked away in my mattress, so he could forget a multi-million dollar payout. It was never going to happen. The look of disappointment on his face was almost enough to make me laugh, but I resisted. This was, after all, pretty serious.
So then he starts talking numbers, much reduced from the initial fifteen million, but still awfully big numbers from a pizza delivery boys point of view. Two-hundred thousand, payable over ten years would be an amicable settlement, he says. It was then that I did laugh in his face. That was pretty much every cent I would make over the next ten years. So I make a counter offer of free pizza every week for a year and he accuses me of not taking the matter seriously, which was true, but how could I? The whole thing was preposterous.
The woman starts crying and I apologise again and I do sympathise with her, what she went through must have been pretty bad, but I point out that it wasnt me that robbed her or beat her up and that Im not under any official obligation to save any individual person and that just makes matters worse and that maybe shes just lashing out at me because she cant lash out at the people who did this.
She starts crying harder, making me feel worse and the lawyers still banging on about numbers. Hes down to seventy-five grand over ten years, but I can tell hes just trying to make himself a little cash. To salvage something out of the ashes of what he thought was going to be his career making case. He doesnt care about his client. Im trying to comfort the woman and hes shouting at me and then Im shouting at him. Then hes poking he me in the chest and then Im pushing him and then he hits me with the womans crutch and then
Well, it was an accident. I didnt mean to do it. It just sort of happened. A nova in a confined space isnt something you want to see up close, but the lawyer and the woman got ringside seats. Fortunately they both survived, although their injuries were pretty severe, although Im told theyll both make full recoveries. The people upstairs got away with a few broken bones, sustained when the floor collapsed out from under them and the building had to be demolished as the explosion had rendered it structurally unsafe.
At that point the city did intervene. They paid off everyone injured in the blast, made them sign non-disclosure agreements on pain of heavy legal action. They told the media that it was a ruptured gas main that wrecked the building and put a gag order on any speculation that deviated from the official line and lastly they revoked my license and told me Id never be a hero in this town again.
And to be honest Im kind of glad. I could use a break from hero work. It was all becoming a big a chore and one Id never get thanked for. So now I deliver pizzas full time and youd do well to remember that, because next time to decide to stiff the delivery boy for a tip he may well take it upon himself to flatten your whole house.
(\_/)
(O.O) Bunny: Our time is coming
(> <)