13/05
Okay, this is pretty weird. There's been a prison break out. En masse. Some guy called Arachnos sent a whole whack-load of troops into the prison and sprang a bunch of people. I was one of them. Apparently one of his fortune-telling peeps told him I was 'important'. Well, since he was springing me from the joint, I figured I'd best take him up on his offer to 'serve' him and all that [censored]. I've never really worked with criminals before. I used to just smash them into walls and throw them in the clink, so
it's a bit weird right now. Lord Arachnos doesn't seem to be a push-over either. I doubt I could take him even with the chip removed. Besides, I don't want him conning onto me. I think I'm in absolutely the wrong place.
[censored]. I'm even expected to break the law for these guys. It might not be my law, but it's still law. I spent five minutes last night bashing my head against the wall. This is so screwed up. At the moment, it seems to be turf wars between Arachnos and other gangs and cults and stuff. I'll be okay if nobody asks me to take down an innocent. I don't know if I'll be able to do that. I really don't.
I'm so weak right now, I don't dare show my true colours, not when I'm surrounded by people who could beat me the snot out of me. [censored]. I sound like a coward.
Oh boo hoo! Poor little me!
Okay, enough self pity. I have to get through this somehow, and keep people from noticing I'm not exactly the criminal type. Should be easy, no?
I think there's something wrong with my chip
it seems to be failing to block my skills that are directly linked to the ethereal parts of my brain. I'll have to keep an eye on this, I mean, I appreciate the fact I can get a handle on my healing magic, but DAMN, I'm trying to be incognito here
I've been in the hospital a lot lately. I keep forgetting that I don't have my sword with me and that I even have the chip. It's getting mental.
Don't ask me about joining Honourable United, I'm lazy. Ask Captain Cathode.
http://www.onthejazz.co.uk/honu/
"If I had a punch, I would so hit that guy." - Millenium (because drinking nail varnish remover is for real men)
13/06
It's been a month. I've been doing small jobs, trying to avoid any messing with innocents, picking my enemies carefully. Usually I crack heads of the guys I know are dealing dodgily, Council, Trolls, those kinds of people. I just can't bring myself to mess with innocents.
Though funny thing happened the other day, there's this new dance club, it's called Pocket D. Some human's worked out how to use dimension technology (which means that hopefully, one day, humans will figure out how to actually store things in a space-sensible way), and he decided to create a club. It's neutral ground for us guys on the Rogue Islands and the heroes of Paragon. I like it there, it feels almost safe, like Arachnos has no power there. I don't mind admitting that guy scares me. Anyway, I was talking to some guy, and he mentioned this cauldron of the Furies. Man, everything those females created is just a mess waiting to happen. Using the cauldron, Arachnos'd be able to make entire waves of super soldiers to do his bidding. I'm not worried about losing my 'position of trust' with Spider Brain, but what the world really doesn't need right now on top of a Light Bringer running around free, is an army of super soldiers bent on world domination.
So, I teamed up with a few people to stop this. Some of them were heroes. And I mention this because the woman who joined me was
wow. Just
wow. She had this bearing, like she was a real quality lady. I don't know how human nobility works, and I don't think there are any around here, but even if she was standing in a crowded room, you'd know she was something special.
She has this
grace. This special quality.
She answered my call for help and she didn't seem to be judging me.
Man. What's wrong with me? She's a security level 50 hero. That's epic.
Don't ask me about joining Honourable United, I'm lazy. Ask Captain Cathode.
http://www.onthejazz.co.uk/honu/
"If I had a punch, I would so hit that guy." - Millenium (because drinking nail varnish remover is for real men)
10/07
I haven't been able to communicate with home for months now. I feel so lost. The chip continues to malfunction and I'm not closer to finding out the identity of the Light Bringer and
I keep being distracted from my mission.
I keep finding myself in Pocket D, scanning the crowd and loitering near the hero entrance. She hasn't come by. Why am I doing this to myself?
Dumb question to ask really. I know why I'm doing this.
She's the one. She's the one for me.
Mother, may her bones rest easily, always told me that I'd know my true love the first moment I saw her. I've had to sit through functions and dinners and all kinds of things as my father tried to find me wives to suit my fancy. Always complained that I was so picky. Said that maybe I spent a bit too much time sparring with men to know what to do with a woman. I'm pretty sure I'm not batting for my own side, though. And now, I really am sure.
Father's going to be [censored] that I've got a thing for a human. Well stuff him. What does he know? It's not like it's wholly unknown for fairies and humans to intermix. Back in the Old Days, it was more or less acceptable.
This is so embarrassing. I haven't even spoken to her again and there's no way I should be talking about intermixing so soon. It's indecent.
Right. This moping about staring at the wall is not going to win her heart any time soon. I must learn how humans go about courtship, and then I will court her. I will win her love and then
I'll work out what to do next.
Y'know, maybe I should have spent more time listening to the bards singing love songs. I feel very ill-equipped to be dealing with this.
Don't ask me about joining Honourable United, I'm lazy. Ask Captain Cathode.
http://www.onthejazz.co.uk/honu/
"If I had a punch, I would so hit that guy." - Millenium (because drinking nail varnish remover is for real men)
15/07
Just spent some time talking to a work friend of mine, the Attorney has said he'll use some of his contacts in Paragon to help me get a message through to my fair lady. I'm so excited my hand is shaking and I can barely type. Apparently it's okay to start off with a love letter, but it's more a fairy thing than a human thing. Still, it is done. I must write one. This is my draft so far:
"My dear Midnight Gaze
I am not much of a poet and sorely lack the way with words that some more worthy possess. I just wanted to say that my admiration for you knows few limits and only grows with each mention of your name. I'm sure you don't even remember me, but please accept the enclosed as a token of my esteem and admiration.
Yours,
Immemoria"
I make myself sound like a nob. Still, maybe the amethyst earrings will say what I meant to say.
Maybe I should re-write it to say 'I love you, please don't smite me'?
Don't ask me about joining Honourable United, I'm lazy. Ask Captain Cathode.
http://www.onthejazz.co.uk/honu/
"If I had a punch, I would so hit that guy." - Millenium (because drinking nail varnish remover is for real men)
30/7
Still no word back from Miss Gaze. I haven't given up hope, I mean, these things take time right. It's not helping that Atters keeps describing her brother as 'the next Statesman'. He seems to be taking more pleasure in scaring me juiceless than I approve of. At the rate he's going, if I ever meet this Midnight Avenger, I'm just going to wet myself and gibber with terror. You know, it's embarrassing to even have to be so scared of him, I'm a bloody general for Frill's sake! I've taken on dwarves and minotaurs and hell, I've even pulled a dragon's tooth. Of course, I wasn't chipped then.
Figures.
The only time having the capacity to punch someone through a solid wall would be useful, and I can't even use it anyway.
On the subject of the chip, I'm worried about it. I woke up with a nose bleed this morning. That's never good. I can't even call my doctor. I may have to go to Styner but one, he doesn't know much about fairy biology, and two, I always have this creeping feeling he wants to open my skull up and fish out the chip for further inspection. Human doctors are still using scalpels
I'm sure 'barbaric' isn't quite fair, but sometimes human practices are a little
dubious.
Not going to go out today, having toilet roll stuffed up my nose to soak up the blood isn't dignified, no matter who you are.
Don't ask me about joining Honourable United, I'm lazy. Ask Captain Cathode.
http://www.onthejazz.co.uk/honu/
"If I had a punch, I would so hit that guy." - Millenium (because drinking nail varnish remover is for real men)
05/8
Ho hum, I'm back in jail again. I thought it might be a good idea to sneak out through the entrance in Pocket D that leads to Paragon City. I just wanted to see Gaze again, see if she got the letter. I came out in some place called Kings Row. Really grotty place, air was heavy with smoke and soot stained the buildings. It was the coughing that gave me away and I swear to Frill, ten Longbow just piled onto me. Knocked me about something chronic and slammed me in the Zig without so much as a 'how do you do'. Jerks.
Got a really strange visitor today. Some guy called 'Gregor' something or other wanted to see me. Kept asking me all sorts of weird questions. Apparently a few heroes have made a case for me. I was stunned. I still AM stunned. What the hell's going on?
Don't ask me about joining Honourable United, I'm lazy. Ask Captain Cathode.
http://www.onthejazz.co.uk/honu/
"If I had a punch, I would so hit that guy." - Millenium (because drinking nail varnish remover is for real men)
12/8
Haven't been able to make an entry lately, too much totally cool stuff has been happening. She got the letter.
SHE GOT THE LETTER!
She visited me. She even believes I didn't commit the crimes that got me thrown in here in the first place. She says she's got some of her friends working on a way to prove my innocence.
She got the letter.
I think I'm going to hyperventilate.
She's interested in me. Actually interested. In me. I think I'm going to puke
Don't ask me about joining Honourable United, I'm lazy. Ask Captain Cathode.
http://www.onthejazz.co.uk/honu/
"If I had a punch, I would so hit that guy." - Millenium (because drinking nail varnish remover is for real men)
22/8
Back in the Rogue Islands now. I escaped from the Zig without Arachnos' help this time. Clinging to the underside of the monorail and making my way to Steel Canyon so I could get to Siren's Call was hell on my shoulders. I've been busted back down to grunt jobs but who the hell cares?
Miss Gaze likes me. And I like her.
We're on opposing sides but
we don't always have to be.
Sounds like Lou's about to lose his rag at Elliot again. I'd better go get them both to calm down. We've got a heist planned for tomorrow and I need them both to be on getting-along terms or we're screwed. Maybe I'll buy Miss Gaze something pretty
girls like pretty things, right? I think this could be the start of a beautiful friendship.
Don't ask me about joining Honourable United, I'm lazy. Ask Captain Cathode.
http://www.onthejazz.co.uk/honu/
"If I had a punch, I would so hit that guy." - Millenium (because drinking nail varnish remover is for real men)
07/05
As I write this, I'm sat in the cell of a human prison called the Ziggurat. It's not so bad in here, there are large draining units that suppress 'super powers' or something. The food's rubbish, but I'll cope. There's some moss on my wall. It keeps me company, which is nice.
I figured I'd write a journal to keep my mind entertained, as the only excitement that happens around here is fighting, and after I broke that dude's arm, nobody comes to fight me anymore. Upshot of this is, nobody asks me to retrieve the soap either, so it's not a total loss.
This all started seven months ago, when I was minding my own business, training my troops and my tenth eldest little brother came legging it over the courtyard at me. He was waving one of his bizarre, spinny instruments and yelling about things being out of balance. Like I knew what that was supposed to mean. Civil defence and warfare is my field of expertise, not gizmos that puff varied coloured smoke every five minutes. Hazel, my little brother, grabbed my arm and pulled me back to his lab. That's no mean feat, I mean, I'm built like a frigging rock compared to everyone else. Anyway, we end up in his lab and he starts going on about the Shadow Bringer disappearing. Just like that. Now, I didn't know much about ethereal mechanics, but I knew enough to know this was a 'bad thing'. The balance of the world just went shonky. He told me that if the imbalance was not addressed, the world would be plunged into increasing entropy until everything just went 'splat'. That was his exact word. I figured the world going splat wasn't a very good thing, so I promised I'd bring it right to Father's attention.
Father doesn't like to be bothered with trivia and minutiae. He says that's what he has his sons for. We get on with the boring parts of ruling and he gets to philosophise and stuff. This arrangement suits me, as I get to run around sharp objects and beat the snot out of monsters trying to break the city borders. It's fun. Very outdoorsy kind of job and I get above ground loads to lay some smack-down on something that's [censored] Father off. Father also well, he sort of has trust problems. Sometimes I'm the only person he'll talk to for days, he's convinced that his royal court is trying to off him. This isn't as farfetched as it seems, as I don't think the throne has passed from father to son for thousands of years. There are four families that it kind of shuffles around, and there's a constant squabble going on. It's pretty mad sometimes. This is why I like my job, it's nice and simple. Things are bad, you hit them. Things are good, you defend them. Nice and simple.
So I went and told him about Hazel's findings. Father nearly hit the roof. He yelled at me, he found Hazel and yelled at him. He yelled at the servants and he yelled at the dragon. He did a lot of yelling. When I got him calmed down enough to give him the herbal tea my sister prescribed, he gripped me by the shoulders and told me that this was a catastrophe. It would be the End Times if nothing was done, the world to be consumed in sprawling chaos.
Frankly, it was kinda scary. You see, chaos is good, in moderation. The Light Bringer is representative of creation and chaos, and the Shadow Bringer is destruction and order. They exist together and there is balance between them. There have been times when there's been just one before, but the world spirals really quickly into a kind of shutting down mode and it's theorised it would just stop existing if balance wasn't restored by a quick death of the remaining Bringer.
Father told me I was to bring death to the remaining Bringer, the Light Bringer especially.
"The Light Bringer is not a force for good, Immemoria. Light burns."
I don't know, maybe it was just the way he said it, but it scared me. I thought about my niece being burned alive in the light and it upset me. I promised I'd kill the Light Bringer, and Father nodded.
But that old paranoia reared its head again. He said that the Light Bringer would have fey senses and if I came too close, he or she would sense me and see right through my shielding. He or she might even be able to know my mind, as that's part of the Light power as well. I didn't like the idea of my target knowing I was coming, so when brother number eighteen (or is it nineteen? I lost interest after number ten, frankly) suggested a modified inhibitor chip, I jumped at the option. Father was very pleased, I think, at my willingness to have the chip implanted in my brain. He said it spoke highly of my devotion to the mission and the seriousness with which I was treating it. He always thinks I joke around too much. Maybe he's right. Anyway, Ilrisi put the chip in me, told me it was a different, more stream-lined version of what we use on criminals in the city. I didn't know exactly what was different about it.
I even had to hang up my sword and my armour. Both are chock full of attunements and shielding runes, they show up like beacons to anyone with an ethereal scanner. And apparently, the city were I was headed, there was an entire battalion of Elflings. Whoopdedoo.
I haven't rumbled with an elfling since some dwarf ******* tried to take down one of our southern gate-houses and get into the city. I went out there to take him on, and met this surface dweller elfling who promptly attacked me calling me a dwarf! I know I'm stocky, but damn! There's just no call for that kind of thing. Naturally I headbutted him and let my horns do the talking for me. If he ever came around again, I hope he's got a pair of scars on his forehead to remember me by. Of course, found one of his buddies down the line, he smelled the blood on my horns and decided I was an enemy and we were going at it wildly, my sword against his axe. It was a brilliant fight, one of those one in a million ones. It was electric and he was an awesome fighter and I wasn't too shabby either and we were just throwing ourselves into it. Ha, still makes me grin to remember it. I hope I meet him again some time.
ANYWAY, Elflings usually have a handle on the ethereal flows around them, and I didn't want to bring a whole squad of them down on myself when I'm trying to be subtle. So I was left with just my chip and my fists.
The human city, called Paragon, was okay. My gift of tongues got me through and I picked up slang and mannerisms real fast. And you know, it's that kind of city where nobody thinks anything of you being half the size of everyone else and having coal black skin. It was nice, actually. I ate hotdogs and listened to radio and laughed at cars (internal combustion engines equal HYSTERICAL), and it was fun, y'know? I didn't forget my mission for a moment, of course. But trying to find a Light Bringer in a city isn't as easy as it sounds. Sure, the huge, blindingly brilliant aura should be a give-away, right? But you try picking one person out in a square when you can't see a damn thing because of light aura that extends throughout the entire square. I saw the aura every now and then, flashing past, or overhead or whooshing past on a train (I presume). No frigging help.
So I started fishing for information. I knew the sort of characteristics the Light Bringer was supposed to possess. He or she would probably have a high academic award, as Light is the power of the mind, so they tend to be smart. He or she would probably have white hair or skin or glowing eyes, be very fast and have a huge magic potential, whether they're using it or not. Apparently they're also arrogant, what with being super powerful, and have an affinity for fire, lightening and other forms of energy.
My research lead me to believe the Light Bringer was masquerading as a 'Hero', which would provide them with the best cover in Paragon. There were HUNDREDS of heroes there. I saw them all the time but no-one bothered me. The chip was working perfectly.
Right up until the moment I got arrested for trespassing in a garden centre.
I was just talking to some plants, getting intel and stuff like that, when bam, police everywhere. So it was night-time and the centre was closed. So I cut one lousy chain-link fence. Big whoop. Their response was TOTALLY over the top. I put a few through the window and tried to peg it but they caught me, slapped a pair of handcuffs on and then, for some bizarre reason, thought I needed to be sent to maximum security in their prison for dudes with super powers.
Totally uncalled for.
Turns out, some crack-pot human mystic ordered it. She turned up, asking about me later. Her name was Azuria. She needs a slap. She has no idea what having me arrested interrupted. Apparently she "saw" me in a series of visions that had a lot of bloodshed and splat in. My wording this time. Then it turned out she had evidence putting me in the right place and right time for a bunch of crimes.
Let's get one thing straight. I did NOT commit those crimes. The only thing vaguely against the law I did was trespass in a bloody garden centre. Someone set me up, but I have to work out who later. Right now, I have to get out of here and find the Light Bringer before the effects of the increased entropy become apparent even to humans.
Don't ask me about joining Honourable United, I'm lazy. Ask Captain Cathode.
http://www.onthejazz.co.uk/honu/
"If I had a punch, I would so hit that guy." - Millenium (because drinking nail varnish remover is for real men)