Humanoid Doom's Cry for Humanity

Created deep in space by the rikti, the humanoid series has plagued the rogue isles and threatens to destroy paragon city. However, to make these humanoids hero DNA is needed. Sometimes this DNA is too powerful than expected, and can sometimes override the programming for short bursts of humanity. Every human has a basic need to live, to have fun, to connect. In an attempt to reach out to the world he grabbed the nearest civilian and used the dark powers to look into their soul. He saw a childhood, something he had never experienced before, the emotions and feelings he received overwhelmed, suddenly causing him to recite this poem:

To be Wild

It is the pinnacle of childhood
And only if it could
Last forever
And never sever
The dream of every child...
To be wild

The wind blowing through my hair
Running without a care
Looking back towards the kite
I see such a brilliant sight
The sunny blue skies
And the smell of fresh pies
Made this the dream of every child...
To be wild

I saw a hawk overhead
Of this moment i will never shed
The emotions that overwhelmed me so
But suddenly i heard a shrill 'NO!'
Then i felt a force hit me into the air
Spinning quickly i lost where
Everything was, until i saw the floor
As it rushed up to meet me like a slammed door
It was no longer the dream of every child...
To be completely wild

I now laid there on the ground
Crying but could hear no sound
Eyes closing the light faded away
Whilst i heard someone say
'Come on. Wake up. Please, awake.
Oh please i pray for goodness sake.'
Now the opposite of the dream of every child
No longer wild

(I need people to give feedback on the poem, please say what you think)

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Actually I was pretty impressed with this, the only thing I can pik a little fault with is that,in places,in seems thatyou've added words in just for the sake of rhyme.

Apart from that,top-notch!

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Nice work. I would give you feedback but im not an english teacher

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Heros
Max Powerz: Lv 50 Tanker

Villains
Max Khaos: Lv 50
Overlord of E.V.I.L.

My Brute - http://maxy-khaos.mybrute.com/

LF SG! Arc ID# 193083

What do i care, good feedback is feedback welcomed

I do know how you mean about added words, although i had a strict time limit to write it, 30mins, although i think all the words do mean something and are intrical to the poem, i dont just add words

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Hmmm not much feedback here, but i dont know how many people actually look at this creative bit. Please say what you think of this, i want to know

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I liked it

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Has anyone noticed that the last winner of the creative genius posted on the offical post was last september, have they stopped doing it or too busy with all the patches and I7?

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