Lemme see, er, this is the Chronicles of the Moo World Order, er, that shall create an era of mooy terror, liberation of milk, freedom for all cows, and the obtainment of all shoes, once of course Secretary General Ban Ki Moo stops using what money Imoolda Marcos hasnt already run off with to buy the contents of every shoe store in the islands buying dozens of donuts to get stale and fuzzy.
Our group, comprised of (in alphabetical order) Secretary General Ban Ki Moo with his faithful soldiers Wang Ibaek, Wang Sambaek and Wang Sabaek, Imoolda Marcos with her rather interesting followers Inept Ferdy, Useless Phil, and Secret Moo, Moogaret Thatcher with Denis, Ronny, and Ton E Blair (whose need to always come up out of manholes Ive found disturbing) and myself, Mookhail Gorbachev, and my robots Vlad, Boris, and Ivan Danko, all of which have personality defects.
With our funds running dangerously low, our prospects for global domination sink, and were reduced to taking whatever tasks are available in the ads of the paper. It gets rather tiring running about the place, but Secretary General Ban sold his limousine, armored truck, and all of his other vehicles in exchange for three thousand, nine hundred, and seventy-eight donuts, of which he ate six and left the rest to their usual fate, so were now stuck rushing around the street.
Our most recent accomplishment was the robbing of the Steel Canyon Bank, which was one of our better successes. As usual, the Paragon Police and Longbow, or Thongbow as we affectionately refer to them as, uncannily had prepared for us, and had our arrival point blocked off. We arrived in the back of a rather small truck, all sixteen of us, cramped and annoyed. The police eyed the group of evil looking cowmen, soldiers, thugs, and robots that came out with slight suspicion before returning to their former activities, which we then disrupted by blowing up all nearby vehicles.
Our reign of terror had begun in the city, and just as we were making progress Secretary General Ban had to take a break so he could deal with a bit of business conducted by his alter ego. And without our fearless leader to guide us, we began idly passing the time.
As I already mentioned, my robots have personality defects, as their original personality was supposed to be that of killer robots bent on destruction. Instead I ended up with Boris being a genial and extremely Zen fellow who at least praises me, Vlad who is extremely bad tempered, critical of me, and complains about every little thing, especially that theyre fed the donuts Secretary General Ban doesnt eat, and Ivan, who is a bit touched and doesnt have a single bit of intelligence in him and is obsessed with blowing bubbles. All three of them are constantly arguing, at the spurring of Vlad. And then there is Imoolda. She isnt particularly sane (as if the constant desire to purchase shoes wasnt an indication), and her minions arent much different. She recently acquired an iPod and is constantly using it, and making Ferdy, Phil and Secret Moo all dance, with death being the consequence of disobedience. Moogaret is rather reclusive and doesnt do much, taking advantage of any small break or halting point to pull out her laptop and begin writing her masterpiece or reading manga, while her thugs stand by occasionally partaking in the frivolous dancing if Imoolda threatens to knock them out with Secretary General Bans donuts.
Secretary General Bans soldiers tend to stay away from the rest of us, prizing themselves on being able to help their leader in his tasks and managing to snag a few donuts before they all go stale. Finally, at the point when I was about ready to deactivate Vlad for his inflammatory comments directed towards poor Ivan and his bubbles, with the poor dear just about in the robotic equivalent of tears and Imooldas men seeming like they were about to collapse from dancing, Secretary General Ban came to an end with his business, which had something to do with another shipment of five hundred boxes of a dozen donuts being airdropped by our base. We proceeded towards the bank hurriedly, Secretary General Ban being eager to get out of Paragon City so as to eat a thousandth of the donuts that would be arriving, senselessly blowing things up as we went.
We managed to enter the front doors after taking care of the police that were waiting without, surprisingly the doors werent blocked or had any sort of security measures, and began the official robbery attempt. Civilians werent evacuated from the bank, which then made the situation even more irking, as we hardly wanted to be confronted by any humanitarian groups or civilian protection groups, and along with dealing with the police officers that were awaiting us, a few civilians made attempts to prevent us from getting further. Firing my weapon at an officer, I was suddenly smacked into a wall by an old woman who was using her oxygen tank as a weapon while also trying to fend off a woman who was trying to spray breath freshener in my eyes. Finally managing to forcefully evict all of the civilians and satisfied that all of the officers were dead, Vlad dealing kicks and firing lasers into corpses to make sure, we then proceeded towards the vault, where we met more futile resistance. Blowing open the vault door, Secretary General Ban stuffed what money he could in sacks and began handing them to us, and then we awaited the confrontation with Rosethorn and her Thongbow entourage. Defeating them with relative ease, we left and made our way back to the truck, which was now even more cramped with the addition of the moneybags and a hostage we managed to pick up, who Secretary General Ban was intending to hold for a ransom, donuts his preference and shoes in Imooldas.
We managed to successfully escape and deal with the ransom, with it finally being decided that it would be split between shoes and donuts, before returning to the Isles with the money we managed to procure. Things were looking better and brighter after that, now that we had enough money to at least make some move forward.
That was last night and before Imoolda woke up at the crack of dawn to go shoe shopping and before Secretary General Ban had another eight thousand donuts delivered. I am ending this here, as Vlad is beginning to go around mocking Ivan and Boris is singing Ive Got Peace Like a River in my Soul extremely loudly.
Lemme see, er, this is the Chronicles of the Moo World Order, er, that shall create an era of mooy terror, liberation of milk, freedom for all cows, and the obtainment of all shoes, once of course Secretary General Ban Ki Moo stops using what money Imoolda Marcos hasnt already run off with to buy the contents of every shoe store in the islands buying dozens of donuts to get stale and fuzzy.
Our group, comprised of (in alphabetical order) Secretary General Ban Ki Moo with his faithful soldiers Wang Ibaek, Wang Sambaek and Wang Sabaek, Imoolda Marcos with her rather interesting followers Inept Ferdy, Useless Phil, and Secret Moo, Moogaret Thatcher with Denis, Ronny, and Ton E Blair (whose need to always come up out of manholes Ive found disturbing) and myself, Mookhail Gorbachev, and my robots Vlad, Boris, and Ivan Danko, all of which have personality defects.
With our funds running dangerously low, our prospects for global domination sink, and were reduced to taking whatever tasks are available in the ads of the paper. It gets rather tiring running about the place, but Secretary General Ban sold his limousine, armored truck, and all of his other vehicles in exchange for three thousand, nine hundred, and seventy-eight donuts, of which he ate six and left the rest to their usual fate, so were now stuck rushing around the street.
Our most recent accomplishment was the robbing of the Steel Canyon Bank, which was one of our better successes. As usual, the Paragon Police and Longbow, or Thongbow as we affectionately refer to them as, uncannily had prepared for us, and had our arrival point blocked off. We arrived in the back of a rather small truck, all sixteen of us, cramped and annoyed. The police eyed the group of evil looking cowmen, soldiers, thugs, and robots that came out with slight suspicion before returning to their former activities, which we then disrupted by blowing up all nearby vehicles.
Our reign of terror had begun in the city, and just as we were making progress Secretary General Ban had to take a break so he could deal with a bit of business conducted by his alter ego. And without our fearless leader to guide us, we began idly passing the time.
As I already mentioned, my robots have personality defects, as their original personality was supposed to be that of killer robots bent on destruction. Instead I ended up with Boris being a genial and extremely Zen fellow who at least praises me, Vlad who is extremely bad tempered, critical of me, and complains about every little thing, especially that theyre fed the donuts Secretary General Ban doesnt eat, and Ivan, who is a bit touched and doesnt have a single bit of intelligence in him and is obsessed with blowing bubbles. All three of them are constantly arguing, at the spurring of Vlad. And then there is Imoolda. She isnt particularly sane (as if the constant desire to purchase shoes wasnt an indication), and her minions arent much different. She recently acquired an iPod and is constantly using it, and making Ferdy, Phil and Secret Moo all dance, with death being the consequence of disobedience. Moogaret is rather reclusive and doesnt do much, taking advantage of any small break or halting point to pull out her laptop and begin writing her masterpiece or reading manga, while her thugs stand by occasionally partaking in the frivolous dancing if Imoolda threatens to knock them out with Secretary General Bans donuts.
Secretary General Bans soldiers tend to stay away from the rest of us, prizing themselves on being able to help their leader in his tasks and managing to snag a few donuts before they all go stale. Finally, at the point when I was about ready to deactivate Vlad for his inflammatory comments directed towards poor Ivan and his bubbles, with the poor dear just about in the robotic equivalent of tears and Imooldas men seeming like they were about to collapse from dancing, Secretary General Ban came to an end with his business, which had something to do with another shipment of five hundred boxes of a dozen donuts being airdropped by our base. We proceeded towards the bank hurriedly, Secretary General Ban being eager to get out of Paragon City so as to eat a thousandth of the donuts that would be arriving, senselessly blowing things up as we went.
We managed to enter the front doors after taking care of the police that were waiting without, surprisingly the doors werent blocked or had any sort of security measures, and began the official robbery attempt. Civilians werent evacuated from the bank, which then made the situation even more irking, as we hardly wanted to be confronted by any humanitarian groups or civilian protection groups, and along with dealing with the police officers that were awaiting us, a few civilians made attempts to prevent us from getting further. Firing my weapon at an officer, I was suddenly smacked into a wall by an old woman who was using her oxygen tank as a weapon while also trying to fend off a woman who was trying to spray breath freshener in my eyes. Finally managing to forcefully evict all of the civilians and satisfied that all of the officers were dead, Vlad dealing kicks and firing lasers into corpses to make sure, we then proceeded towards the vault, where we met more futile resistance. Blowing open the vault door, Secretary General Ban stuffed what money he could in sacks and began handing them to us, and then we awaited the confrontation with Rosethorn and her Thongbow entourage. Defeating them with relative ease, we left and made our way back to the truck, which was now even more cramped with the addition of the moneybags and a hostage we managed to pick up, who Secretary General Ban was intending to hold for a ransom, donuts his preference and shoes in Imooldas.
We managed to successfully escape and deal with the ransom, with it finally being decided that it would be split between shoes and donuts, before returning to the Isles with the money we managed to procure. Things were looking better and brighter after that, now that we had enough money to at least make some move forward.
That was last night and before Imoolda woke up at the crack of dawn to go shoe shopping and before Secretary General Ban had another eight thousand donuts delivered. I am ending this here, as Vlad is beginning to go around mocking Ivan and Boris is singing Ive Got Peace Like a River in my Soul extremely loudly.