Need Help With Concept


RasberryRabbit

 

Posted

Alright after you have read the below chracter profile it would be nice if you could answer these questions.

1. Did I steal the name Jack Wolf from something? I don't remeber.

2. Help me think of a super hero name for this character.

3. Does he sound cool?

4. What else should I add to the profile?

Game Mechanics of Character

Name:

Origin: Magic

AT: Scrapper

Primary Powers: Katana

Secondary Powers: Dark Armor

Power Pools: Teleportation, Conceealment,

RP Mechanics of Character

Real Name: Jack Wolf

Bio: Jack Wolf was a prominent TV Actor on the Soap Opera “As Super Man turns the world.” Soon Jack was booted off the show for a more handsome character. Jack’s life was thrown into a tailspin by this. He coulden’t find any more jobs and Jack receded to his mansion. Soon he could no longer afford to pay for his mansion, it was taken away and Jack had to find a cheaper living.

Moving to Paragon City, Jack was able to find an apartment dirt cheap in Kings Row. While out on his roof one day trying to fix his attenna during an unusual thunder storm he was accosted by a life mage and two thorn wielders. Before he could get away, the Life Mage sent him into a trance. Levitating him into the air Jack struggled to get away.

As Jack floated in the air he could see the clouds forming over head. Just as the final word of the spell was spoken and lighting bolt struck him, this charge of electricity fused the powers of magic with him. Suddenly he disapeared from the earthly plain, he found himself in the nether world. He could no longer see where he was or what he was doing, but he knew that he was moving. Before he knew it he had apeared at the steps of Atlas. Not knowing the powers that he had.

Source of Powers: He gets his powers simply by reaching his hand into the nether world and drawing out the sword from what looks like thin air. He is also able to step in and out of this world to teleport and conceal himself.


 

Posted

the questions i have after reading his origin....

now that he has these magical powers, what are his motivations for fighting crime, for helping paragon city?
you mentioned he is in hard times now, so is he in it for the money? for self serving purposes?

and it is unclear as to what happened with the life mage. was he trying to steal your soul? it sounds more like he was trying to help you, that he gave you magic powers and sent you to atlas park, for some unknown reason, which im not sure a life mage from the villianous group circle of thorns would do.
i think you need to clarify/expand on why and how you got your powers.
perhaps you are some pawn in a greater scheme, he gave you these powers to use for the circles purposes, but you fight to not do that....unless you want to be a villian....
otherwise, everything sounds good, though jack wolf isnt an original name, it is a cool one the name no doubt has been used before, but i cant think offhand of where
for the choice of your name for superhero, that really should be your decision, i wouldnt like to play a hero that was named for me, some typical things come to mind like soul blade, life blade, seeker, soul seeker, rebirth, soul reborn, i dunno, things on that line would seem to fit....hope that helps


 

Posted

Well basically, he was trying to give me to the NetherWorld, which is, yes apart of the greater scheme. But the lighting killed the mage before he could finish. thus putting Jack into a limbo, so now he is able to cross between both worlds.

I now have a name for him, The Lurid Lightning.


 

Posted

ok, you should change then the wording a bit....
the part where it says....
the final word of the spell was broken, and lightning struck him, the "him" makes me think you are talking about jack, since you didnt mention the life mage in that paragraph.
it sound more like lighting hit jack.
if you make it more clear that suddenly lightning struck the life mage, breaking the spell in mid incantation, thus only partially sending jack into the netherworld, and he now has attachments to both worlds, that would explain things better

the name lurid lightning is a great name, id be suprised if anyone else has taken it.


 

Posted

Thanks I will change it in my bio, hope it still fits. Yeah Lurid Lightning isen't taken, I can't believe I was able to get it.