The Short Profile Story of Doom! (Superchimp)




This is the origin for the amazing and marginally radioactive Superchimp...
Born in the humid jungles of South America, this young ape was a keenly intelligent little chap, spending his days exploring the ruined human buildings and temples, playing with the other chimps, and generally monkeying around. This blissful existence continued until the evil big game hunter, Bushtucker Man, came along to capture his family and friends, and use them in his fiendish plan to conquer the world with Simian Mime Assassins. Fleeing for his life – and a brain free of mind-controlling witchety grubs – the little ape hid in a temple, where he found a giant statue of a winged monkey, a dedication to the powerful god of fate, winged monkeys, and exceptionally pyrotechnic special effects. Climbing to the very top of the statue, the ape tried to hide behind the monkey’s ear… but slipped and fell, impaling himself on an inconveniently placed sharp pointy magic crystal, the gem of Dayersecks Masheenah. This gem kept him alive, gifting him with amazing powers – including speech, opposable thumbs, and a somewhat camp red-and-blue PVC costume. The legend that is SUPERCHIMP was born!

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My most surreal background, I think.